What Happens At Starbucks Stays (on your record) at Starbucks

Like many other neurotic, panicky, hyperactive people who only sleep 4-5 hours a night, I drink tons of coffee.

And I’ve started to notice that my life seems to revolve around Starbucks — not even just the Starbucks where my Barista crush works.

Clearly, I feel very comfortable there, because last Friday I plunked down at a counter and cried my eyes out while questioning the meaning of my life. However, when I went back to that same Starbucks on Sunday, I was little apprehensive about whether I could really show my face there again.

I walked up to the register and ordered a venti coffee–thankfully from a barista who had not been present during my meltdown.

“I’m sorry–we’re out of Venti cups. Can I give you a grande?”

“Sure.” What choice did I have?

“It’s probably for the better,” he smiled at me. “People have been complaining that you get a little too antsy when you drink the Ventis.”

I smiled back weakly before surrendering to the joke. “Oh, yeah? Who’s been complaining? I want names.”

He looked confused for a minute before landing his gaze on another barista who had been around to witness my antics. “He did! He complained!” The other barista looked at me and turned red. There was a pregnant pause.

“Well,” I admitted. “I was a little a worked up the last time I was in here.” The implicated barista smiled with relief. We all chuckled.

“It’s ok!” My barista assured me. “It happens to the best of us.”


5 thoughts on “What Happens At Starbucks Stays (on your record) at Starbucks

  1. I get relentlessly made fun of whenever I go in to my local coffee shop…probably a result of my relentlessly making a fun of everybody there…(I really don't believe in karma in any metaphysical sense, but, y'know…).

    I may just head over there right now…

  2. aw. i miss my law-school barista. she and i communicated on some kind of psychic level. she would have my drink ready for me as soon as she saw me coming, and somehow seemed to sense when i needed to move from tall to grande. love. her.

  3. Way back when, when I was fooling myself about being in college, I knew this girl who used to wear funny hats. If she was ever talked about, it was always, “oh yeah, the chick who wears the funny hats…”
    One day, I noticed she had this really distinguishing mole on her face. As I thought about it more and more, I came to realize her funny hats were a way of drawing attention away from her mole.

    So what I'm trying to say is: If you walk into that same Starbucks and give them something else to label you with(e.g. toilet paper hanging out of the back of your pants) no one there will ever remember you were crying in the corner.

    hope this helps…


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