My guess is that if you’re reading this post you’re either my friend, my relative, aspiring to some day become my relative, or a hapless Internet user searching for tickets to the hit Broadway Musical, “Wicked”. You went to a search engine, you entered “Wicked” and just like magic you got….my blog. And, because you’re not a friend or relative, you have no unrealistic expectations about my writing prowess or ability to make you laugh. In fact, you’re just disappointed.
You may ask: Why have you chosen to foully deceive me thus, Unkind Witch? (Or maybe if you’re not fond of stumbling your way through botched pseudo-Shakespearean language, you opt for less dramatic phrasing.)
The answer is three-fold.
Firstly, it’s because I thought that if I had to give up my dream of starring in “Wicked,” I could at least steal the attention of potential audience members for a few minutes.
Secondly, it’s because I want your ruby red slippers. Badly.
Thirdly, it’s to prove a point. Sparkly shoe fetishes aside, if you found my blog through a search engine, it’s probably not even close to what you’re looking for. But before you blow up in a cloud of smoke, or try to drop a house on my sister*, you can find the sites you actually want in the findingDulcinea Theater Guide. Whether you’re looking for a deal or need tickets for tomorrow night, you’ll find sites hand-selected by human beings, not an algorithm. You’ll save time and energy. You’ll save yourself from random people like me. Instead, you can get serious about taking better care of Toto, or Tornado-proofing the house.
Of course, you can continue visiting the Wicked Witch, as well. I’ll continue to supply you with (surprisingly un-evil!) tips about art, entertainent, shopping, and of course, a barrage of cheezy pop culture references.
*I don’t have a sister. I have a brother. If you drop a house on him, the entire social scene at the University of Wisconsin will collapse. After years of high rankings, it just got bumped from the Princeton Review’s List of top 20 Party schools, so please don’t make matters worse.